Efficiency & Over Optimization: the Path to Neurotic Unhappiness

I got along very well with my bosses when I was at Yahoo! Many of them became good friends and mentors of mine. 

I remember when one of my bosses told me: “we get along because you have extremely high standards & work ethic”. This really meant something to me because he was Japanese and was known to be an incredibly dedicated and tough boss. We would work through the night sometimes or definitely very late. 

This definitely seeped into the rest of my life as it happened at a very pivotal time in my life and career of mid-20s. It’s served me very well as this perfectionism, these exacting high standards helped me become a pretty good operator. I overly optimize everything, my diet, my schedule, my meetings, almost everything. I show up for meetings on time, I follow up and do what I say. Religiously. And it’s shocking how this puts you ahead of 99% of the people out there which is a sad comment on people but also explains much. Simply by just doing the basics and working hard. 

It’s all about the mission and goal. This is the reason I “Get Sh-t Done” like a machine. 

Unfortunately this trait has also turned into a very sharp double edged sword. I am highly intolerant of people who don’t do the work, have a crap work ethic and frankly, unreliable. I try to cut them out of my life quickly & have no time or patience for them. Unreliable people drive me berserk! 

I also tend to over optimize my schedule and be incredibly intolerant of deviations from my plan. I get so much angst and if I am honest, deep anger and rage when things don’t go as planned. 

I am so task-driven to get things completed that I ignore everything around me: my health, my family and many times my peace of mind and happiness. How can you have peace of mind when there is another goal on the horizon? 

Don’t really have an answer here. I’m trying to ring fence my calendar and not over-schedule myself. I’m trying to keep open blocks of time and learning to say NO to opportunities. I should add that as I am writing this, I am not doing a good job in this department. Still overcommitted to too many things. I still drive myself crazy when things inevitably do not go as planned. I need a high level of predictability which is impossible in the world we live in. 

Thus, to help myself, I try to meditate as much as I can, breathe calmly when things don’t go according to my plan and repeat “Inshallah” (God’s Will) to myself. 

Efficiency is great for business. It makes you a great operating executive but not sure whether this is an asset in your personal life. But better to have than not I guess. Another conundrum to wrestle with. Life is messy and you need to just accept it which is hard for a Type A like me.