If Your Life Sucks, It’s Your Fault: Taking TOTAL Personal Ownership (My thousandth and ongoing reminder)

I was reading several Twitter exchanges recently and it reflects the dysfunction in the modern West these days. So many people complain about how their lives suck. Blaming their parents, their friends, their boss, the patriarchy, their government and even society. Blaming America.  Everyone but themselves. 

Yes, inequality exists. Yes, it’s unfair and it sucks. Yes, it does need to be recognized and called out sometimes. But ultimately this is a waste of valuable time and energy. 

In fact if there is a matrix or cabal of greater controlling powers, they want you to waste time moaning, complaining and blaming others. It stops you from taking any action to better your life or situation. Yet it’s so much easier to blame others and try to tear them down, just look at the awful “midwits” on Twitter or the comments section of YouTube. It probably even feels good for a short period of time too. 

But ultimately it just leads to your own downward spiral. And it’s why I have no time or patience for these whiny complaining losers. Especially if they are not actively trying to change their circumstances. And I admit I was once one of those people, complaining about a bad situation but not doing anything about it. Going nowhere fast in life. Until I woke up. 

So when something bad happens to you, you must take full responsibility. 

Fired from your job? That’s your fault because you did not do a good job or did not deliver results or have the EQ to get along better with your peers. Or I did not recognize fast enough about the organization and management changes and my mal-adaptation to these changes. 

Have money problems? You did not understand the rules of money or save enough of an emergency fund. 

Cheated by your business partners? You did not pay attention to their failings and the signs of their untrustworthiness. 

Have family problems? Or does your partner want to leave you? You did not pay attention to them, you did not take care of business. You also probably did not focus on being the best version of yourself and the best option for them. Especially as a man. Your job as a man is to become strong of mind, body and finances. If you aren’t, why would your partner respect you? 

I know this sounds harsh but I've experienced all of this myself. And in the last decade too. But I can tell you, the best way forward is just owning it, even though it hurts your ego. 

Take the hard lesson from it. Oh and by the way, they are ALL hard lessons. Ponder and reflect on it & don’t beat yourself up too much. Easier said than done, as I am personally harsh on myself even though I know it’s not useful. 

 Come up with a plan, then fix the situation as well and fast as you can. Move on and don’t make the same mistake again. Life is supposed to be tough & you are supposed to suffer. 

Get over it and go do the work, become capable and build a great life for yourself and your loved ones. 

Or keep on complaining and blaming others, and stay stuck in where you are at, like all the other losers in life. The choice is yours. 

As the brilliant Luke Belmar says: “Winners gonna win, Losers gonna lose.”