Limiting Beliefs: Invert, Invert, Invert to Get to Bigger & Better Life
A “Limiting Belief” as defined by Lifehack.org is:
“is a state of mind, conviction, or belief that you think to be true that limits you in some way.[1] This limiting belief could be about you, your interactions with other people, or with the world and how it works.”
We’re all driven and act on the beliefs we are raised with, through our families and friends, our education and experienced through our lifetime. We usually don’t even question them as they are so ingrained in us. But this is a big mistake as our beliefs are our programming and set our capacity in life and achievements. They limit us to what is possible. Just like how a computer program sets specific limits, these beliefs set artificial limits for us.
Things like “I can never dance/fight/ sing as well”, or “I suck at math” or “Only Stanford and Harvard grads raise money from VCs.”
We all have some version of these playing around in our heads. And as my therapist always asks me: “How does this serve you??”
To go further from:
“Limiting beliefs can have a number of negative effects on you. They could keep you from making good choices, taking new opportunities, or reaching your potential. Ultimately, limiting beliefs can keep you stuck in a negative state of mind and hinder you from living the life you truly desire.”
(Source: https://www.lifehack.org/858652/limiting-beliefs)
This is why self examination is so important. Understanding yourself and what drives you. Understanding what you want and why you think it is hard or even impossible to get there. Question yourself, question your assumptions and use first principles. The article listed above gives you a great overview on how to identify these limiting beliefs so you can alter them.
I also try to tie beliefs with big ambitious end goals. When I think about big goals, I set it at some time in the near future and then work backwards. Break the goal down into smaller bite sized pieces, year by year, month by month, week by week and day by day so it becomes easier to process. The goals should be so big that they scare you.
Then you surround yourself with other outstanding, smart(er) individuals. Do this by friendship groups, business partners and even masterminds, which are formal groups of people who get together regularly to help each other grow and keep each other accountable.
This is not even a confidence thing: you probably want to be less than confident. That means your goals are HUGE.
Better to lack confidence than be overconfident. This way you work harder and over prepare.
This explains the difference between female and male founders I’ve noticed in all my years. Female founders tend to work harder and perform more to compensate. Men tend to be overconfident. And while this is great for pitching, presenting and fundraising, it doesn’t always lead to great operating skills. Or willingness to develop them. Obviously generalizing but in my somewhat large sample set, it rings true. If you lack confidence but have big goals, you will over prepare.
The point here is: we are our own gating factor. This is why I love the concept of NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) and all of Tony Robbins stuff. You learn what your limiting beliefs are and then you systematically challenge and reprogram yourself to be better. You brainwash yourself. Then you also surround yourself with awesome people whether online through the content you consume or live in person.
That is why I prefer being based in San Francisco most of the time, despite the gross city mismanagement, the crime, the high costs and bubble of arrogance and douchebaggery at times. It’s full of super smart & ambitious people. These all help motivate, inspire and provide models for you to remove your negative programming and get ahead.